Persian condolences: what to say
Sympathy is where getting the words right matters most, and Persian has a small, fixed set that always lands well.
The core condolence phrase is tasliat migam تسلیت میگم, "I offer condolences". The formal version, right for a message to someone older or someone you do not know well, is tasliat arz mikonam تسلیت عرض میکنم.
For the person who has died
Khoda rahmatesh kone خدا رحمتش کنه means "may God have mercy on them", and it is what Persians say whenever a deceased person is mentioned, even years later. A gentler, non-religious companion is rooheshoon shad روحشون شاد, may their soul be joyful, often used when remembering someone fondly.
For the family
The phrase that carries the most warmth is gham-e akharetoon bashe غم آخرتون باشه, "may this be your last sorrow". You will hear it at every Iranian funeral. Another is khodavand be shoma sabr bede خداوند به شما صبر بده, may God give you patience, since patience, sabr, is the quality Iranians wish on the grieving.
Writing a condolence message
A short, natural text to an Iranian friend could read: tasliat migam azizam, khoda rahmateshoon kone, gham-e akharetoon bashe. Three fixed phrases, no improvising needed. In grief, formula is a kindness: everyone knows the words, so nobody has to search for them.
Mourning customs worth knowing
Iranian mourning follows a rhythm of gatherings: the funeral itself, then memorials on roughly the third and seventh day, and a major one on the fortieth day, chehelom چهلم. The first anniversary, salgard, is also marked. Black is worn, and close family may wear it for weeks. If you attend, dark clothing and a quiet tasliat migam to the family is exactly right.
At a memorial you may be offered dates, halva, and tea; accepting is respectful. Nobody expects a foreigner or a learner to know every custom, but the phrases above, said sincerely, are always received with real warmth.
What not to say
Persian condolences do not dwell on details of the death, and cheerful platitudes translate badly. Stick to the fixed phrases, offer help plainly if you mean it, and let presence do the rest.
Tasliat migam for the family, khoda rahmatesh kone for the person remembered, gham-e akharetoon bashe as the warm close. Those three carry you through the hardest conversations Persian will ask of you.